Oh the pain
In the past two days I have had some laugh out loud experiences without anyone to laugh with me. Let me start from the top:
Last night I decided I should go to bed on time because I was not feeling well and I was getting up early in the morning to go to Kanchanaburi. So I hopped in the shower because otherwise I literally stick to the sheets. First of all Thai showers are bathtubs (in this case) with a small removable shower head about chest high. The problem with my shower head (aside from being chest high) is that when you turn it on it spray along the wall and out the tub but if you use it handheld it can spray out the other side of the tub. This spraying problem arises from the fact that the pressure could take the outer layer off a soccer ball and the wet bathroom floor because they have a tiny piece of plastic known as a shower curtain. So on my first night I figured out a way to control this crazy messed up shower head of madness. I wet my hair and all. Place the shower head between my knees (water pointing down of course) lather, wash up and then rinse with shower head again. There is a little balance required with this (not holding the shower head too hard so it turns to the side or too soft that it falls) but I had it down pat. So I begin this ritual and put the shower head between my knees. Lather my hair, use my face wash and get ready to clean off the dirt of the day when WHAM!! I lose control of the shower head of madness. It drops and turns the only way a firehose can turn, up! Right into my face. So now it is spraying me in the face, spraying the fragile ceiling tiles and going OVER the curtain on the floor. I bend into the spray to pick up the shower head get a handle on it, get it back between my knees when WHAM it falls again!! Now it is spraying again and shampoo is dripping in my eyes, face wash in my mouth and where did that soap go? I pick the shower head up again and WHAM it falls. I finally get it under control with watery eyes, a soapy mouth and no soap, water on the ceiling, the bathroom floor and my dry towels. Ah well this was only the beginning.
That night I turn out the lights and go to sleep I am awakened for a phone call fall asleep after awhile and am dreaming quite nicely when OWWW What was that on my scalp. I start awake and realize in my self conscious that my hair had been moving while I slept and that I may have just been bit. I frantically sit up turning my head aside and waving my hands frantically in my hair (what's worse touching what bit you with your hand? Or letting it fall out?) So after a split second of waving I hear a plink on my pillow. This is even worse so now I am frantically waving trying to get the lights on by the bed to see what it was that just fell on my pillow. By the time I find the lights I can't see it anymore. My head is feeling the bite, my body is wired and I am turning over pillows and linens in a desperate search to see if it is in my bed still. No dice. It took me a looong time to fall asleep. In the morning I found a large cockroach in the corner of my room belly up. (I think I wasn't getting any closer to that thing). I don't know if it was there before, if somehow I smooshed it moving my mattress in a desperate search for the fiend and it crawled to its death, or if I have a lethal level of poison in my scalp. As a precaution, please do not bite my scalp in the near future. Anyway I left today for Kanchanaburi with a little less sleep than I expect but strangely, feeling much better. More embarrassment to come
Last night I decided I should go to bed on time because I was not feeling well and I was getting up early in the morning to go to Kanchanaburi. So I hopped in the shower because otherwise I literally stick to the sheets. First of all Thai showers are bathtubs (in this case) with a small removable shower head about chest high. The problem with my shower head (aside from being chest high) is that when you turn it on it spray along the wall and out the tub but if you use it handheld it can spray out the other side of the tub. This spraying problem arises from the fact that the pressure could take the outer layer off a soccer ball and the wet bathroom floor because they have a tiny piece of plastic known as a shower curtain. So on my first night I figured out a way to control this crazy messed up shower head of madness. I wet my hair and all. Place the shower head between my knees (water pointing down of course) lather, wash up and then rinse with shower head again. There is a little balance required with this (not holding the shower head too hard so it turns to the side or too soft that it falls) but I had it down pat. So I begin this ritual and put the shower head between my knees. Lather my hair, use my face wash and get ready to clean off the dirt of the day when WHAM!! I lose control of the shower head of madness. It drops and turns the only way a firehose can turn, up! Right into my face. So now it is spraying me in the face, spraying the fragile ceiling tiles and going OVER the curtain on the floor. I bend into the spray to pick up the shower head get a handle on it, get it back between my knees when WHAM it falls again!! Now it is spraying again and shampoo is dripping in my eyes, face wash in my mouth and where did that soap go? I pick the shower head up again and WHAM it falls. I finally get it under control with watery eyes, a soapy mouth and no soap, water on the ceiling, the bathroom floor and my dry towels. Ah well this was only the beginning.
That night I turn out the lights and go to sleep I am awakened for a phone call fall asleep after awhile and am dreaming quite nicely when OWWW What was that on my scalp. I start awake and realize in my self conscious that my hair had been moving while I slept and that I may have just been bit. I frantically sit up turning my head aside and waving my hands frantically in my hair (what's worse touching what bit you with your hand? Or letting it fall out?) So after a split second of waving I hear a plink on my pillow. This is even worse so now I am frantically waving trying to get the lights on by the bed to see what it was that just fell on my pillow. By the time I find the lights I can't see it anymore. My head is feeling the bite, my body is wired and I am turning over pillows and linens in a desperate search to see if it is in my bed still. No dice. It took me a looong time to fall asleep. In the morning I found a large cockroach in the corner of my room belly up. (I think I wasn't getting any closer to that thing). I don't know if it was there before, if somehow I smooshed it moving my mattress in a desperate search for the fiend and it crawled to its death, or if I have a lethal level of poison in my scalp. As a precaution, please do not bite my scalp in the near future. Anyway I left today for Kanchanaburi with a little less sleep than I expect but strangely, feeling much better. More embarrassment to come
posted by Noellebellz at 8:23 AM
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